Friday, December 18, 2015

12 Star Wars Characters Who Could Have Used a Loan

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away… Securing financing was still a big deal for small business owners.

As it turns out, the InterGalactic Banking Clan had some pretty strict regulations with their small business financing. Here’s a list of 12 characters or organizations from Star Wars who could’ve used an out-of-this-world loan.

1. Anakin on Tatooine

The Force was strong with him, but the Chosen One definitely could have used some funds to tune up his podracer.

Got this one here.

2. The Trade Federation

Surely a backup generator could’ve prevented Anakin from disconnecting all of the Trade Federation’s battle droids so easily?

Got this one here.

3. Sifo-Dyas

This mysterious jedi probably took out a large loan to fund his clone army.

Got this one here.

4. Princess Leia

Let’s be honest: R2D2 is great, but astromech droids aren’t the most secure systems for hiding Imperial plans.

Got this one here.

5. Uncle Owen

Did Luke really need to go pick up those power converters from the Tosche station? Or could Uncle Owen have taken out a loan to have a greater supply on-hand?

Got this one here.

6. Mos Eisley Cantina

Maybe some redecorating would have attracted a less violent clientele… But the band stays.

Got this one here.

7. Jawas

Invoice financing definitely would have opened up cash flow for their scrap trading business.

Got this one here.

8. The Rebels

Investing in warmer gear for their Hoth base might’ve saved Luke (and his tauntaun) a whole lot of trouble.

Got this one here.

9. Yoda

With such a long time in business, this Jedi Master probably could’ve tried to take out a loan for a bigger swamp. Or is there no try?

Got this one here.

10. The Emperor

Equipment financing would have covered the second Death Star—though as it cost over 1,000,000,000,000 galactic credits, the Emperor might’ve needed a truly stellar credit score. That’s no moon, indeed.

Got this one here.

11. Ewoks

Slings and rocks probably didn’t contribute all that much to the fight against Stormtroopers on the forest moon of Endor.

Got this one here.

12. The Skywalkers

Maybe a line of credit would’ve come in handy… To fund all those missing limbs from the Skywalker family.

Got this one here.

Alright, we’ve got to roll on out of here. May the Force be with you.

Got this one here.

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